Ricky Sims : Coming Out To Dead People ⚝⚝⚝⚝
Soho Theatre, London
RIcky Sims does what he says on the tin. Coming out to Dead People is the guilt-ridden carousel of him wanting to come out to his Chinese Malaysian mother – just as she is diagnosed with terminal cancer. Hardly the deathbed surrounded by thriving, successful grandchildren that she envisaged. If you are lucky enough to have a living mom and she comes to visit then The Great British Bake Off Musical might be more immediately appealing. However, don’t write this one off. If you like 2 parts hauntingly humorous and 1 part harrowing in your recipe for a night out this is the surprisingly special show that may just be for you.
It’s his London debut but Sims’ sensibility is all NYC. The plight of the recently arrived immigrant wanting to prove his parents made the right choices in their life combined with the neurosis of a New Yorker where refusing therapy would be a sacrilegious waste of an expensive health insurance package.
Sims skilfully meanders through stories of his birth with a cleft palate, the bullying at school, his sexual awakenings, and his journey into gay adulthood accompanied by four straight female friends who provided more beardage than the seven dwarfs. He can come out to his father, but his mother’s terminal illness proves to be just one barrier too much. How can he bear the pain of her death whilst being haunted by the thought that love given to someone she never truly knew is not unconditional?
Sims’ style has a tremulous quality. Soft-spoken, he underplays punchlines and then surprises with a dank, dirty, and delightful story of sexual escapades. It’s somewhat beguiling. And its power builds as the show progresses. There is a layered warmth that both defines the humor and distills the love he has for his mom. The first two-thirds are a revelation of the Chinese Malaysian immigrant experience in the USA while the final third touches on the universal themes of parental expectations, the inability to express emotions, and the hard choices of when to accept the pain of inertia or provoke the pain of change.
Sims’ show is deftly balanced. Both touching and tickling the heart. The soft style has the audience leaning in and the content has them gripped. If this is his London debut we look forward to the next visit, though hopefully, the body count will be lower
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Queerguru Contributing Editor ANDREW HEBDEN is a MEDIA and cultural STUDIES graduate spending his career between London, Beijing, and NYC as an expert in media and social trends. As part of the expanding minimalist FIRE movement, he recently returned to the UK and lives in Soho. He devotes as much time as possible to the movies, theatre, and the gym. His favorite thing is to try something (anything) new every day”
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