Out Late

The overwhelming feeling that you get from the 5 gay seniors featured in this documentary who came out of the closet so very late in life, is a mixture of courage and regret.  Each of them had chosen to do what society had expected from them for most of their lives and rather face the rejection (and much more) from their families and communities, they had unhappily surpressed their true sexual identities for decades just to please other people.
 
Elaine came out as a lesbian at the age of 79 after her husband had passed away.  She admitted to one rather fruitless sexual encounter with another married woman years ago, but now liberated she acts like an over-excited kid in a candy store desperately looking for a sexual partner that will not be easy to find in her remote part of the countryside and at her age.  Unmarried Walter came out at the age of 60 in front of his church’s congregation and now partnered, he expressed his deep sorrow that he was never able to share this real identity with his mother who he had been so close too 
 

Widowed Ken came out at the age 72 and sensibly enrolled in a therapy group to explore his sexuality but now that he is awoken that, admits to being desperately lonely and wanting his first ever gay partner. Leanna came out as a transgender after being a man for the first 60 years of her life, now true to herself and fully female, she has been abandoned by her entire family including her son who hasn’t spoken to her for over 10 years now.

Cathy is the slightly odd one out of the group as she has been with her partner for years but it wasn’t until the Kansas Legislature was in the throes of passing yet another piece of anti-gay legislature did she feel the urge to come our publicly.  She and her wife have been best friends with their conservative Republican neighbors for years even though they thoroughly disapprove of any equality for gay couples. Like so many other straight people, these ‘friends’ patronizingly believe that they are the ones that God has entrusted to decide how gay people should live. Credit to Cathy and her partner for not letting the bigotry get in the way of their friendship.

This is a quiet understated wee movie that gently reminds us how younger generations, particularly those in urban environments have so much more choice, and it also serves to remind us too, that many other gay people even today still cannot be true to their own identity. As the film states, it is never to late to be yourself, and we can just hope they do not have to wait until they too are seniors to be liberated.

Available via Amazon or Netflix Streaming


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