Once in a while we come across a new small movie that is unafraid to tackle important issues with a very big heart, and ” Boy Meets Girl” is certainly one such film. It is a tender, human, sex-positive romantic comedy that explores what it means to be“real”: to live and love authentically to the truth of one’s heart, regardless of the sex or small town you’re born into. We were so moved by the refreshing and sensitive way that writer/director Eric Shaeffer told this story that stars a transgendered girl but is so much more about all the other people in her life who learn to embrace their own identities. It also challenges us to suspend our preconceived views on gender labels and be as open to what happens as these lovelorn kids are.
I am a straight man and I date women and I have dated transgender women as well in the past. Getting to intimately know some transgender women and also meeting transgendered men gave me the idea of wanting to write about them. The idea that a cisgendered straight man who had always dated cisgender women started to be interested in dating transgendered women at a certain point of his life was very interesting to me. Opening up his heart and his eyes to dating these women I thought was a fascinating story especially as it had some real life correlation with me. However quite honestly, the real driving force was much more abut making a story about people who at the core want to be loved for who they are, as that essentially is what all my films are about.
Without giving too much way, what surprises so many people who have seen the movie is that Ricky the transgender girl had the smallest arc and the smallest transition emotionally of any of the characters. Everyone around her was having much more dramatic profound emotional realizations and that was very exactly what I planned. I wanted the character of Ricky the transgender girl to be ‘normal’ as possible in terms of her life goals, her challenges, her joys, her family and her friends. In a lot of movies, transgender characters are too often being portrayed as people who have all kind of challenges that are different from cisgender people and that is not really the case in a lot of my own experience and from the research that I did. Most of my trans friends have very wonderful lives that are replete with all the same challenges and joys of cisgender people.
This is really what this movie is all about.
QC: How did you find the wonderful Michelle Hendley, and how important was it to you that you cast a transgender actress in this part?
ES: Besides Laverne Cox, there is a very very small list of transgender actors and actresses who are successful enough to be represented by Agents, and so they are hard to find. I Googled both ‘transgendered women’ and ‘transgendered actress’, and by a stroke of luck I found Michelle’s Youtube channel. On all her Vlogs she was talking about her life and her boyfriends and the fashions she liked and she clearly had a performance bone in her body because she was not afraid to be on the net and do these very impressive videos. She looked the part and is young and very pretty and had the right personality.
When I got in touch with her she was understandably dubious because she didn’t know my work so she wasn’t sure if my offer of an audition was legit or not. I also had my concerns as she had never acted before and it is a far cry from having charisma to make a Vlog to being in a feature film. Not only that, she was going to be the star in my movie, which was going to live or die on the performance of her alone. So I rehearsed and auditioned her over Skype and then flew her to NY and had her workshop with other actors. It was a six month process before I gave her the part and over that time she worked harder and harder and got better and better.
I had a lot of latitude because this was an indie movie with a small budget so I could cast anyone I wanted in that part. Had it been a bigger film with a lot more money behind it I would have been answerable to both investors and a Studio and I would probably have been under a great deal of pressure to cast a famous cisgender actress in that role. While every actor can portray all sort of characters who they aren’t in real life, no one can argue with the fact that a transgender woman would have the absolute organic profound experience of being transgender. I also thought it important element of this whole project that I give this unique opportunity to a transgender girl.
ES: No, not at all. I thought it would be unrealistic to have a movie where everything was just so completely fantastic in her life, so I wanted to ground her and show her exposing her more troubled and challenging part of her youth with her making these online videos. I got the idea when I was actually looking around on the Internet trying to find an actress to play the part. I don’t know how I ended up on this video of this young 13 year-old edgy Goth tough-looking girl who was doing this cue card video about being bullied. At the end of this video she broke into a smile, which was so disarming and completely charming as it made her look so childlike and sweet and adorable. It literally broke my heart when I later found out that this particular girl’s life ended tragically as she either killed herself or was killed. Although Ricky’s story has a much happier and positive outcome with such a supportive community, I still wanted people to understand that she didn’t always have a perfect life. So the cue card video sequence is to show that she had struggled with things that we all struggle with in her youth.
I always wanted it to be very realistic and in fact it is on the edge of being a fable, but it was also a very crucial element to me to ensure that there is a lot of positivity in the story.
have a supportive family life. Like most people I had suffered from the delusion that is born out of what the media tells us which portrays transgender women as being victims of system that denies them the same experiences as cisgender women and not having loving support in their world. In my research I found that was simply not accurate and many of the transgender women I spoke with came from small communities in the South and were not bullied and had fully supportive families.
QG: You swept the board at the San Diego Film Festival winning 11 Awards, and amongst the many others you have been awarded is the prestigious Iris Prize in Cardiff. Do you think that will help you get the movie beyond Gay Film Festival audiences?
QG: You have a reputation for putting a great deal of your own story in your movies, is that a fair observation?
And I think going forward creatively that less personal projects will maybe more interesting to me now.
ES: I really enjoy creating TV shows and movies and being part of a community of people experiencing a TV show or movie that I have made. I was at a screening of ‘Boy Meets Girl’ in New York the other week and I saw two men who had their heads on each others shoulders as they watched the movie. When it ended they looked at each other and had a really sweet love heart kiss, and that brought tears to my eyes. Seeing the bond these two lovers had that in some way my film had helped them create, was just priceless to me. That’s why I do what I do.