Divorce rates for gay marriages are about the same as straight marriages, running at about 2% a year. Lesbian divorce rates are, however, approximately twice as high as those for gay male marriages. This may reflect the fact that most divorce is initiated by women. So, if you’re a gay male couple getting married, the odds are in your favour that the marriage will succeed. No such luck, however, for Nicky (Luke Evans) and Gabriel (Billy Porter), stars of director Bill Oliver’s new film, Our Son.
Successful book publisher Nicky and house-husband Gabriel co-parent their cute eight-year-old son Owen (Christopher Woodley). They’ve been together for thirteen years and live in a beautiful home in New York. On the surface, the perfect modern queer family. However, cracks in the relationship have begun to show. Nicky works really long hours and is somewhat tired, grumpy and detached at home. Gabriel does the bulk of the parenting, is alone a lot of the time, and the couple have different ideas on parenting. Then Gabriel drops the bombshell that he has feelings for another man he met six weeks previously and whom he has secretly been seeing. Nicky is shocked and hurt and tries to salvage the relationship, but matters escalate quickly and soon Gabriel has filed for divorce, even though his six-week fling didn’t work out. The couple each appoints divorce attorneys and try to sort out the custody and financial arrangements amicably. Communication soon breaks down and the only option seems to be a court battle.
What follows is a detailed study of the effects of divorce on a male couple, their son and their friends and family. Both Evans and Porter give convincing portrayals of fraught queer men going through a divorce. The viewer will spend time working out which partner is most suitable to bring up little Owen – rich, successful Nicky who is actually Owen’s biological father (he was born via surrogacy) or poor but nurturing Gabriel who has been Owen’s primary carer. However, where this film falls somewhat short is in the chemistry between Nicky and Gabriel. It’s a bit of a stretch to believe that rich, sexy, hunky, successful Nicky would have fallen for the poor, far less attractive, ten-years-older, less intelligent, unsuccessful actor Gabriel in the first place. Also, Gabriel seems to have left the relationship without any consideration for how he is going to fund his life. How realistic is it for an unemployed partner to walk out of a marriage in New York and very quickly end up with a smart 2-bed apartment? Divorce is divorce, regardless of sexuality, and this plot has been played out to death across film and TV for decades, most notably in 1979’s muti-Oscar-winning Kramer v Kramer, starring Dustin Hoffman and Meryl Streep. Our Son treads a similar path to Kramer v Kramer but is nowhere near as good.
Fans of Evans and Porter will not be disappointed, although those used to Evans’ thirst-trap speedo pics on Instagram may lament the lost opportunities to show off his perfect body in this film. Quote of the film goes to Nicky’s cousin Max, who, at a family gathering, comments. “It must be hard to fight for the right to marriage and then end up divorced like everyone else.”
Queerguru’s Contributing Editor Ris Fatah is a successful fashion/luxury business consultant (when he can be bothered) who divides and wastes his time between London and Ibiza. He is a lover of all things queer, feminist, and human rights in general. @ris.fatah
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P.S. You may like to check out Queerguru's interview with filmmaker Bill Oliver.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m23SgmpG1lU&t=3s